July 22nd, 2011

Architects might as well design their own bike racks

Conscientious architects want to touch the whole site with their hand, colonize it with their sensibility, make it all ring in harmony. Earning her fees here at Glasgow's Museum of Transport, Zaha Hadid (or more likely, one of her leckies) has echoed the shape of the building's array of portals, in the bike racks out front. More on the building's mild bike friendliness here

My Incomparable Talent for Writing Reviews

Gentlemen, many among you have become regular readers of my blog, having first ambled upon one or two of the reviews I have written of my treasured Velorbis commuting bikes. Though this is a blog about architecture and cycling, it is a consumer society in which we live. When internet users are not searching for porn, they are searching for product reviews. Elucidation falls way down the list, which is why I am resigned to getting only two or three hundred daily hits to my blog—not quite enough to sell adds, I don't think. I have already harnessed the world's supply of intelligent readers, with an interest in cycling as it impacts upon architectural thinking, and you amount to roughly 250 hits every day, god bless you all.

If though, I were to buy a new bike and publish the kind of detailed review I wrote of my Velorbis a few months after I bought it, I know I would see another September 2010, when over 1000 people arrived via their web surfing at that specific blog entry. I since learn that anyone who has ever bought a Velorbis, or sold a Velorbis, or who is Velorbis, is well acquainted with my reviews. Allow me to put aside my usual modesty, and just say what everyone knows, that my reviews are the only product reviews, of any kind, in the world, that artfully combine technical examination, literary flair, and an art critic's talent for putting into words that which underlies a viewer's feelings toward objects of beauty.

The day is approaching when I shall discard forever the family car, and buy a cargo bike for shopping and running the children to school. If you are a manufacturer of such a jalopy, do consider this invitation, to give me one for free, that I will review in the impartial manner readers demand, and that actually increases bike sales and brand credibility. Better to have them find a ruthless, exhaustive review, and go into their purchase with open eyes, than pass altogether on buying a cargo bike, because let's face, no-one has reviewed one quite the way I will review yours.

Contact me in confidence via my email, that you will find with a few clicks. If you're trying to decide, why not read a few more reviews, of the Pashley Guv'nor, Velorbis Scrap Deluxe womens, of balloon tires, and the Velorbis Scrap Deluxe mens! They really are better than anything you might find on Lovely Bicycle.

Velorbis tip brim to my hairdo

I swear, I had no idea Velorbis hung on my every move to this extent. I have only been styling my hair like this for a week, and already Velorbis have hired a new model for all of their promotional material. Naturally I praise them, for backing the right man to lead men's cycling style. Guys, a tip: the shoes aren't quite working.